Lateness in Lotusland

Tony Wanless | Image: Jupiter | Published: April 17, 2008

It seems that in the States, 15 per cent of people arrive at work late at least once a week. The survey by Harris Interactive also noted that one in four late workers make up false excuses.

Laying aside the obvious observation that one in four seems kind of low – I mean how many people are going to admit to sleeping in? -- it did get me thinking about whether we're different here in BC.

I'm pretty sure that we're no slouches in the lateness department either. Don't Toronto people like to make fun of us – falsely, of course – for our slack attitude to work? Aren't we supposed to be the lazy ones in this country, too busy saving whales and smoking BC Bud to actually do anything useful. Like all those rabid careerists in Toronto.

Hey wait a minute, maybe there is something in that. And is that a bad thing?

Anyway, I digress. I suspect that in BC we're not just late for work: people here are late for everything. After all, we do have our own time zone, and sometimes I think it's in an alternate universe. I once had a colleague who was so chronically late that when he did show up on time one time, we were so shocked we gave him a standing ovation.

Yes, I think that here in Lotus Land, time is kind of ..... elastic. We operate in the “ish” zone – we meet at 9-ish, or noon-ish, or 5-ish. This gives us at least 15-20 minutes wriggle room. It’s the BC version of time management.

But we still lie about it for some reason. And what do you think those phony excuses might be?

As usual, I have a few suggestions:

1. It snowed and I was afraid to go outside.
2. Was I actually supposed to be at work at a specific time? Sounds kinda old school.
3. The concept of “late” is a cultural bias, imposed on a downtrodden population by an arrogant authority that wants to turn us all into machines. Fight the power!
4. The line at Starbucks was really really long.
5. Philosophically, what does “late” really mean?.
6. I forgot where I was working this week.
7. The daffodils are up!
8. I had to check my email and RSS feeds.
9. The traffic out there is brutal. And I'm talking about Skytrain.
10. There was a bear/cougar/gang of thug geese outside

my door and I couldn't leave.
11. I do my best creative work when I’m not bound by industrial structures like time.
12. Can we talk later? I'm trying to live in the moment.
13. I had to get a passport so I can go shopping in Bellingham.
14. I had to drive 75 blocks out of the way to avoid street construction.(okay, that's probably real!)
15. Dude, what's the problem? I showed up, didn't I?

Would love to hear your suggestions.

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