It’s 8:30 p.m. when the dented, steel-grey carriages of the Skeena, the VIA Rail train serving the northern route from Jasper, begin their final wheezing crawl into Prince Rupert, the rainfall capital of Canada’s multi-fjorded Wet Coast. Far from a pampering Rocky Mountaineer excursion, this old-school locomotive feels like a perambulating 1950s diner, complete with a side order of cozy home-style charm.
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I’m standing in an overheated hotel reception room in downtown San Antonio, loosening a tie that feels like a noose and knocking back the free Merlot as if it’s water.
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Bleary-eyed and grumpy after a sleepless night in my city-centre hotel – a month on the road researching a guidebook has left me missing my Vancouver bed the way an amputee misses a limb – I’m wandering Dublin’s historic, near-deserted streets on a chilly, fog-shrouded Saturday morning.
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I’m wedged between preening TV glitterati from Mexico and ancient newspaper hacks from New York, sharing small talk about the size of Minnie Mouse’s rear, when the quadraphonic drum roll begins.
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It’s a bright Monday morning and a deep rumble is resonating from within the Flight Centre shop in Kerrisdale. Locals flickering past the red-and-white storefront cast knowing glances at the rattling doorframe as they dash into coffee shops for their morning hit of java.
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It’s minus-seven degrees Celsius, I’m encircled by a jagged crown of snow-capped mountains and the white breath tumbling from my open mouth suggests a serious attempt on the world chain-smoking record. But even though I’m only wearing swimming shorts, I can’t remember ever feeling so toasty.
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Gazing into the cold, dead face of a killer isn’t one of my preferred vacation activities, but on an early morning creep around southern Australia’s Old Melbourne Gaol there isn’t much choice.
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My bloodshot eyeballs are as dry as sandpaper, I’ve read every magazine, safety card and sick bag within a 25-metre radius and my twisted body is moulded into the exact shape of an uncharitably narrow Airbus economy seat. I’ve lost count of how many hours it is into my three-leg flight to Malaysia and I’m seriously considering opening the emergency hatch for a little relief.
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With its skiing in the morning and golfing in the afternoon, B.C. is heaven for corporate tour planners. But is the industry willing to ante up the marketing dollars needed
to capture a piece of the growing international incentive-travel market?
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I’m zig-zagging between the grassy knolls on the Plains of Abraham with a heavy heart. Now a swath of tranquil parkland, this historic Quebec City locale is where hundreds lost their lives in the 1759 battle between French and British forces, a milestone in the birth of the nation. It’s also the place where one of my biggest relationships finally disintegrated in an afternoon of juddering sobs, but there’s not a single plaque, information panel or historic re-creation to mark it.
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